A memory

 

I said I would smile but I couldn't. Your eyes were too cold. Your face was like a wall filled with lies but I could see right through it. I could see the emptiness in your soul. 

I wanted to see you from the depth of my heart, but you were as numb as I last recall. So therefore I couldn't sketch a smile. I don't even remember if I blinked. It was as painful as ever seeing my greatest failure, my only weakness.

I promise you no one will ever know this. Haa, of course I don't intend to keep it. What did you expect when there's no ending and no beginning at all? I know there is better for me, and I will leave. No more turning back for you, lost memory. 

I said I would smile, but there was no reason for it. We should turn away from the things that don't make us happy. You didn't smile either, stranger...

The ones who don't love

"Without you there is no beauty."

Lie!

The worst feeling that one can get is to believe he/she is happy without his last love or any love, but I said
last" because well you've just forgotten it, whichever that is.. And I say "worst thing" because having such power at hand means never falling in love again. And not because you're hurt, but because you realize you're better off without anyone by your side. Of course, you have a gf/bf for a time, but you'll never love her/him, you finally have the world at your feet and that is devastating, my friend.

Power is the biggest challenge of all. You can't control it. You can't run from it. You like it too much already. And this feeling will make you feel as empty as an abyss. You have this power, but there is no one with whom you can share it. And what is a kingdom without its queen and king together? Emptiness...

You may think this is kind of sad, but come on, it never happened to you to be in love for a time, and then just forget it all and never to be able to feel that again? It never happened to feel the logical arguments how they enter your mind and soul? You never felt you're above all, you can't be misled anymore, you can't be in love because you are at a higher level. And this level is empty. 

There are rare cases when the heart listens to the brain, but when it does, it means no one that you know is good enough for your soul. No one can keep you entertained and still be themselves around you. Maybe the world bores you today, and no one can make the feeling go away. Maybe it was just one love that you wish you had. And now that you're over it, there is no such thing to make you feel again.

You aren't numb. You can laugh, be whoever you want to be, but you aren't able to give attention, at least for a long period of time to someone. I don't know if they deserve it or not, but as long as you don't want them what does it matter anyway?

God, it's so good to be free, and so damn scary not to love anyone! But you won't give up this condition soon because freedom was all you wanted... was all they wanted... now you have it. Enjoy! ^_^

Life = a masquerade

Hi guys. I'm sorry I haven't been writing in a while, but I've been busy with school. Today I remembered something very important about the people. They always want to seem something they aren't. It's not they're not good persons, or they don't have enough talents, but they just need something else. Sometimes I wonder why, and sometimes the answers.

Welcome to  the masquerade. Here you will find impressive costumes and beautiful masks, insidious creatures, angels, but who are they? Their names fade away with the night. That happens with those who are not real, who only want to be acclaimed for something, it doesn't matter what, just being in the center of the attention gives them satisfaction.


Please, enter this room; here you'll find incredible lies to build up your perfect life, here you'll find advice on how to kill feelings, but what you're actually going to do is to destroy the very last drop of truth in your eyes. Why? Why is it you who isn't pleased with life? How much the satisfaction lasts? An hour? A day? A week? How much do you have to suffer to get on moving with your false hobbies, broken dreams and naive personalities? And even when you say "thank you", is that a real "thank you"? Did you mean it? Or you'll just stab me in the back when I turn around. 

Is this costume of a warrior helping you hide your cowardliness? Is this you? Can you recognize yourself in the mirror? All dressed up, speaking some strange words that don't define you, talking to high class people and making your real friends losers? Who are you? Still remember that?


Welcome to the Masquerade...