Monday, July 16, 2012

Guilty


I've been asking around "why do I have to be guilty for his/her actions?", "why do I need to take the blame for his/her incapability of moving on?" The best part is that I discovered I don't.


Everyone is responsible for their actions. You are what you think. So, if your happiness is another person, and that person refuses to take that role, you have no right to blame her for your unhappiness. You have the right to say what you like, what you don't want but without stepping on someone else's free will. I thought that I was guilty for their actions. I thought I was guilty for leaving from their lives. I thought I was guilty for ending the story. But no! They are the only ones to blame for all the stubbornness in their head, for not fighting. They all say they love life, but they don't do anything to make things better.


Until tonight I've waited for their demons to come straight at my door and tell me face to face that I'm some kind of monster. This never happened of course, because I'm just a human, and I left like everyone does, and in their hearts they know it's not my fault sincerity and trust were mislead.


It's your choice to let someone into your life, your choice to get over some tragedy, your choice to make friends, to let them down, to confess your love, to shut down your feelings and so on. Your choice to blame someone else for your own faults, to feel guilty for something or to pretend you forgot.


So, beginning with tonight, I am not guilty for your depressions, for your choices, for your "never do anything and go with the flow". I hope you won't drown too much in your own heart, and I hope I won't be there if that happens, because my mood of "I care" might want to jump and save you.


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