I'll miss you, Summer

Summer ended today, maybe. For many of us it ended yesterday, but for me I'm not sure yet. It didn't feel like autumn. And it's not going to feel no matter if my hands and feet are cold at night, or if at eight o'clock gets dark. In my mind summer it's still going to be there just for another month.

Of course I didn't get to do everything I planned, but at least I'm free now. I can do whatever I want. It's not like I have something in mind, actually I gave up some of my plans. Not worth it :)) I guess we all find ourselves in the position to realize something's not worth fighting for. 

I didn't get a chance to say hello to summer properly, and I'm not sure if I want to say goodbye. I read somewhere (actually on facebook) that the worst thing is to get a glimpse of chance just to realize you're fooling yourself. I disagree. When chasing a dream, no matter if you achieve it, if you can fight even a little, even for nothing it's worth it. Yeah, maybe some things are better off where they are, but until you try you never know what's best. 

Things happen for a reason - no. It's just time that passes fast and some situations that connect, the rest is as special or mundane as you let it be. If you want to learn something from it, it's your decision. Of course, we often choose to forget, to let go...

I try not to believe in destiny, because it doesn't always go the way you want it, and if you're convinced something should happen and it doesn't, you might fall of track.

Summer ended...

This summer things have changed. I learned that ghosts exists and that "forever" is a difficult promise to keep. Tomorrow school starts for me and I just want to sleep.

I discovered that my friends who needed help now they have helped themselves. Everything is fine for everyone and maybe the same. But not for me. You'll say that I'm the one who needs help, but trust me I can handle it, whatever it is, what I really need is sleep, lots of hours of sleep. I usually don't write things like this on my blog, but I got the feeling that I should.

Maybe you think I'm depressed because school starts, but it's much more than that. No, it has no connection with the ghosts that I heard... or saw or whatever. I think all this changes are coming from inside me, from my young heart that wants to fly. Last summer I flew, this summer I grew up.