I said I would smile but I couldn't. Your eyes were too cold. Your face was like a wall filled with lies but I could see right through it. I could see the emptiness in your soul.
I wanted to see you from the depth of my heart, but you were as numb as I last recall. So therefore I couldn't sketch a smile. I don't even remember if I blinked. It was as painful as ever seeing my greatest failure, my only weakness.
I promise you no one will ever know this. Haa, of course I don't intend to keep it. What did you expect when there's no ending and no beginning at all? I know there is better for me, and I will leave. No more turning back for you, lost memory.
I said I would smile, but there was no reason for it. We should turn away from the things that don't make us happy. You didn't smile either, stranger...
You have your mind set on your goal. The only image that lies behind the stage is making you numb. Without moving, without making a sound you crawl into darkness to search just for light. As you lose yourself deeper you believe you've found it: the dream, the light, the end of the tunnel, but it's another illusion that will make you feel more nervous.
I am paralyzing the mind with poisonous thoughts. The horror of losing what I never had is slowly taking control and it invades my dreams, my vision, my judgement, everything that one can think of. Is even making fake memories of the real ones. I am paralyzing the mind with pure evil and with some songs that awake a monster in the soul.
I am listening to evidence of the dead to fill the empty holes in my heart. They say to stop, to live the life I have and they lost and then they send unclear messages for me to try to understand and after I achieve my creepy goal, they stare into my mind directly like a disease that never leaves. I love the shadows, I love the feeling that makes me think I'm not alone in my mind.
You're still searching for light in the depth of darkness, you're still hoping to see the end of all the suffering, to find peace. But what made you think there is light in my mind? Get out; it's time to stop the disease from spreading.
"I don't know you... but it's alright..." *singing*
You, like almost people in the world have a band or a singer that you like their songs so much you could listen forever to them and never get bored. You know that feeling when you're listening to their new album or single, that feeling of joy and euphoria and fury because you want more and more songs from them.
My favorite band is The Ramus. They're from Finland and I've got to admit that northern bands have something unique in their music. I'm not saying other don't have, but there's a high chance of finding a special band from the North.
It happens at night when I can't sleep, when I can't stop thinking about the next day or other things to want music. And with the right songs I fall asleep in a few minutes. I hate that I never remember what was the last song I listened to. Anyway, from the millions of songs, I know I'm waiting for some that are special.
And when I have nothing to do, I can't find myself, or I don't know what to write about I know that music will always get me on the right track. And I have a strong connection with the sounds and when I find my soul in the lyrics then I really like that song!
Because I can't help it I'm going to link to The Rasmus' latest hit: I'm a mess. Their newest album is going to be released on 18 April. OMG! Just 5 more days and I can't wait!
Now, ignoring my obsession for this band, I'm going to post a song I discovered recently. She's the favorite singer of Lauri Ylonen, lead singer of The Rasmus, but don't mind me. I don't like her because she's his favorite, but because this song in particular gives me an interesting feeling.
The lyrics are written by Bjork and I'm glad that someone finally agrees with me: " I have seen water, it's water, that's all..." It's not like I wouldn't want to see Niagara Falls, but I hate to know the names of a thousand rivers at geography. Come on, it's just water! Anyway I don't fancy the song because of this part but it has something cosmic, a feeling of peace, but of sadness, a feeling of knowing it all and yet knowing nothing.
